Every generation and every culture has
its own triumphs and makes it own mistakes. We can often
see both the triumphs and the mistakes in our child-rearing
practices. In the early parts of the 20th century, prevailing
wisdom insisted that a child be picked up as rarely as
possible and little physical affection given. From that,
a generation of structured, emotionally detached parents
emerged. Then we had Dr. Spock and the invasion of what
was called “permissive child rearing.” Here,
parents imposed fewer and fewer limits on children. Such
methodology helped produce the group called “baby
boomers,” most of whom have some very interesting
memories of the late 60’s and early 70’s when
the drug culture went wild and enticed these undisciplined
ones into a life of “free love” and excess.
I would also suggest most boomers have not really recovered
from that—excess (as in excessive consumption, excessive
wealth, excessive food, excessive need for therapy) continues
to govern the lives of many of that generation. This is
the generation of people who thought they could have it
all. They were, of course, seriously disappointed.
The current crop of parents, many of whom
are children of those excess-driven boomers, now put their
stamp on child-rearing. Their children enjoy and/or suffer
from an excess of scheduling and ambition. We are seeing
a generation of highly accomplished young people, often
combining high levels of expertise in academics, athletics,
the fine arts, and community or even world service. Yes,
they are doing it all.
And just as the baby boomers paid a price
for their generational excess, so are those in this young
generation paying the price for having it all in their
way. They are living with a huge sleep deficit. No one
is getting enough rest, and there now seems to be a very
strong correlation between inadequate rest and growing
obesity, growing numbers diagnosed with ADHD, growing
depression, and growing debilitating stress.
Just sleep. People need to sleep more if
they really do want to accomplish more. It seems so counter-intuitive.
Sleep less, study more, do better, use more calories,
stay more slender. That’s what we think. But perhaps,
just perhaps we are wrong.
The urge to compete, to win, to dominate,
underlies much of the culture of excess, whether we see
excess consumerism or excess accomplishment. Human beings
spend a lot of time comparing themselves to others, wondering
whether we make the mark and how we can move higher in
the rankings. This is not necessarily unnatural—the
same thing happens in much of the animal world. However,
there is a difference between healthy competition and
unhealthy competition. There is a difference between a
soul that looks forward toward the call of God with the
goal of perfection in love and one who looks over his
or her shoulder, afraid that someone else might catch
up or pass by. One is motivated by love; one is motivated
by fear.
Perhaps we need much more rest and down
time than we think. Perhaps we need fewer things to do
and more time to be. Perhaps we need time to pray and
contemplate the glory of God and our part in this created
order. Perhaps we really, really need good sleep in order
to accomplish anything worthwhile. Perhaps, just perhaps,
the Scriptures are right when they call for a holy day
of rest, a time with family, a time to worship and regenerate.
Perhaps, just perhaps, we’ve got a few priorities
out of line these days. Just something to think about
. . . when there is time to think.
